“I do not like green eggs and ham I do not like them Sam-I-Am.”

Halloween has always been one of my favourite holidays. I’ve always loved the freedom of being in a fancy dress outfit. The funny thing is I don’t have a single childhood memory of trick or treating. We lived out in the country side – miles away from much of anything except a few other houses, all with long drives and vast stretches of darkness and shadows.

I do remember once going trick or treating with my cousins as they lived in an actual ‘subdivision’ with houses all close enough that you could rack up quite the bounty of goodies which was great fun.

Tomorrow is our annual party and my friend Sam has flown over from Spain to attend. Extreme? Yes, but that is how we roll.

Sam and I have been friends since I moved to England and started working at British Gas. We decided it must have been 1998 that we met, which in some ways seems a lifetime ago and in some ways seems like yesterday.
We have been through a few parties together that is for sure.

me sam

Last night we all went to Chapman’s Peak Hotel as Sam fancied calamari. We then started reminiscing and talking about the nonsense we have gotten up to through the years.

Norm reminded us of the many times Sam and I would go clubbing in Birmingham, then phone him to come and collect me in the middle of the night, then while waiting I would hear a great tune, dive back into the club only to leave Norm driving round the dark streets of the city for hours looking for me while I am inside gyrating on a podium.

Or the other time when Norm dropped 3 girls in the city to go clubbing, then when he collected us there were about 10 people waiting. He gave us all a lift, even stopping at the chippy for take aways as we of course were all drunk and ravenous.

When we got home and stumbled out the van we get a phone call from Loz, one of the girls who went into town with us. She was asking where we were – oops, we left her in the city and brought home loads of other randoms. Norm then had to turn around and drive back to the city to find her. This was at least an hour round trip and it was probably 3am or so by then.

When he got back to find a big pile of uneaten fish and chips he was even more unimpressed with me.

The other time which he loves to recount is when Sam, myself and group of girls had gone out after work in Solihull one night when Norm was in London working. He was to come and collect me on his way back, so he rang us to ask where we were. My response ‘we are in the back of a police car’. We had somehow managed to get into a huge street fight with a gang of drug addled youth. The one lil fucktard had grabbed Sam by the booty and I decided to thump him. I then chucked a full coke can and hit him in the head which then made it all kick off big style. It was all rather messy and ended up with one of our friends getting badly injured.

I think our best memories are of my birthday weekend in Amsterdam. A group of 6 of us went and we had such an amazing time, one of my all time best memories. We stumbled round in such a state of disarray and chaos for 3 days but we did have such a laugh. We barely slept and lived off of cones of chips with mayo. Most of those stories are not suitable for public display however.

Needless to say, when Norm was unable to attend the invitation by the British Consulate to come for drinks on a Navy ship next week, Sam and I of course offered to attend in his honour. Knowing our past exploits and our penchant for trouble he was not in any way keen on that! (Coward)

Sam, like me, has a real affinity with Africa. She has worked here several times as a volunteer on various game farms and been here to visit me twice. She is now applying for a job here, doing the same thing she does back in Gibraltar. If she is successful I will be such a happy Kitten. I have a gap in my life for a fun, frivolous friend to get into trouble with now that Mandi has left. Fingers crossed 🙂

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